I’m a professional golfer in the PGA.
I intend to win the championship today.
When I hit the balls, they always go far.
I always get Eagles and Birdies instead of Pars.
On every hole that’s a Par 3, I get a hole in one.
I am always the victor when the game is done.
I play whether it’s raining, snowing or sunny.
I have three girlfriends and a whole lot of money.
I beat Tiger Woods each and every time we play.
He’s so jealous that he’s going to leave the PGA.
If you intend to play against me, I have bad news.
Like everybody else, if you play against me, you will lose.
I beat every golfer time and time again.
I am famous because I always win.
(This is a fictional poem.)